In-Flight Safety Cards
Az Airtoons A740-es Airboat weboldal biztonsági szolgáltatásai. Kérjük vigye magával a safety card-okat és figyeljen oda utaskísérőinkre!
- Urinating in the ocean is not polite.
- Nailed the dismount.
- Fart masks will be deployed in the event of unexpected flatulence.
- Look under our seats for a world of change!
- Old electronics are bad news.
- Water-powered lighters have a 100% failure rate.
- Twinning is not permitted on this flight.
- Try to aim for the toilet please.
- Gotta hang on to something!
- This may also lead to severe back pain.
- Yummy red licorice for those boring water-treading times.
- To ensure an expedited evacuation, please limit thumb wrestling matches to two minutes each.
- I spy... something blue!
- See Jake enjoy the fun slide.
- Should you spot a house fly you must sneak up behind it as slow as humanly possible.
- ...Although muff rubbing definately is.
- Life vest fashion statement.
- BabyStick(tm)
- Our AirCondoms feature SemenSuck™ technology.
- Dwarves need oxygen too.
- What's that?! It's Pat.
- Seamstress.
- Concentrate. Don't let it get to you.
- Purple flour plant workers.
- Industrial-strength too! Holds up to four times the assweight of competing suspenders.
- Rolled up money not included.
- BEWARE THE FLOATING RED X!
- We have a strict no-80's-hair policy. By boarding this aircraft you agree to these terms.
- SHUT THE DOOR ALL THE WAY, OKAY?!
- If you hear a hissing sound, back slowly away from the edge of the raft.
- Can I get a woo woo?
- THIS IS NOT AN EXIT. (?)
- THIS IS A SMUT-FREE AIRLINE!
- Oh heavens, excuse me! I must have passed gas!
- Remember when JNCO jeans used to be cool?
- HIeeee-YA! Judo CHOP! Get outta my way, bitches!
- Floatation ouch!
- 25 CENT PEEP SHOWS!
- Whip it good!
- Rusty makes a break for the exit carrying the Purple Magicman's Bag of Tricks!
- Village People groupies love flying the friendly skies.
- Synchronized Airplane Exiting: The latest addition to the Summer Olympic Games.
- No smoking oversized white bandana-wearing cigarettes!
- Beware of SHE-HULK!
- SHE-HULK vs. Bryant Gumbel.
- Wave to the fish. They get lonely.
- Be Wireless. But dont be cheap.
- VIOLET-SWEATERED MOMS GET OXYGEN DIBS!
- If you open the door mid-flight, your ass is outta here.
- Look at your shoes! Why can't you just wear normal brown ones like me?!
- If you sit on your watch it will probably break.
- Peer pressure will not be tolerated.
- Free mechanical bananas can be found within floating tents.
- Be sure to slip into your blue 70s wet suit before a water landing.
- Please be aware that concrete DOES NOT float.
- Fantastic Dan may decide to give you a pat or two on the behind.
- Mask protects against eggs falling from ceiling.
- If you can't figure out how to open the emergency exit, you were doomed from the start.
- Passengers with extensive wax buildup will be forced to leave the aircraft.
- It's ok to exit on the wing if the line exiting the plane is going too slow.
Extra Kormányzati Biztonsági Intézkedések
Nukleáris csapás esetén, ügyeljenek a következő kiegészítő figyelmeztetésekre!
- Drive in reverse into the explosion to avoid facial burn.
- Your car will notify you if it is horny.
- Listen to the sounds of the 70's on your 70's stereo.
- This is the recommended way to destroy old computer equipment.
- Don't let filing cabinets to team up and sexually harass you.
- The window can't tell you what to do. Who does it think it is?
- Let the boombox play as you enjoy your day in every way.
- Do not use elevators if they look dumb.
- After using a public phone, wash up.
- Don't bet on bird vs. fish fights. Because come on, 3 fish vs. one bird?
- If you see a biohazard sign, keep on trucking, man.
- What a messed up dream.
- The dwarf sanctuary entrance may be smaller than normal entrances.
- Don't run from fire, you're pretty much screwed at that point.
- Staring at the wall can cause radioactive harm to your person.
- Actually, you have 5 minutes and 12 seconds left to live.
- Car would crash into house, but house would stand victorious.
- Do not be afraid to backhand someone if they come in without knocking first.
- Texas is radioactive and it's big and ugly and weird.
- The pilot episode for Superman didn't take off because of his crawl-fly style
- YARRR gimme your money, I'm captain blue bandit.
- Get consent before mounting, otherwise things could go awry.
- To dislocate your shoulder, hit it up against the door REALLY HARD.
Mik azok az Airtoons?
Kifigurázott safety card-ok.!
Főiskolai éveim alatt ültem egy repülőgépen felszállásra várva, amikor feltűnt, hogy a safety card-ok képeinek nincsenek címei, amit kicsit furának találtam.
Azt gondoltam, "Na most ez a jóember itt piros cukorkát eszik a mentőmellényből??!" Így aztán elkezdtem írogatni a saját képaláírásaimat, a többi már történelem!
Fogadjátok sok-sok szeretettel!